What I did in my school holidays By Cassie (age 33)

I finally have got around to blogging about the holidays.  Finally after an 11 week term, two weeks of pure bliss.  No teenagers, no work politics, no bells and time for me and sleep ins!

I got to start the holidays early as the Friday was the last day of our adoption course.  Now completing the course, we will soon be allocated an adoption social worker, be assessed a little more, work on our profile for the people to choose us from (has to be in a binder, like a school project - going to love the presentation factor part - no digital software/dvds etc allowed).  I guess then after that, we go into the pool and wait to be chosen.  For us, adoption is the way we have chosen to go.  Foster care - we are just not at a place in our lives to cope with a lot of the baggage these kids come with.  Maybe in later years.

Anyway, much of my holidays was spent in my hometown - Dunedin.  I hadn't been down for about nine months so the last time was about 3 months before I started on the road to getting banded and beyond.

Good to see parents.  Dad greeted me at the airport, and while waiting for luggage questioned whether I thought the op was worth it since I had restricted my food choices.  I simply said to him I had lost over 30 kilos, was doing so much more with my life and my health was on the improve.  Many of the food choices I have restricted myself on are because if I start eating things like bread (which is sticky anyway) I may not stop.  I love bread.  It is easier just not to have it.  I have had to put chocolate in a similar category.
Mum was funny.  After giving me a hug - said there wasn't a lot there to hug anymore - awww - But trust me still heaps there!

My brother has seen me every few months, and had only seen me a couple of weeks before my visit.  He is very supportive of what I've done though and will give me compliments in his brotherly sort of way :)

I saw a few friends while down there too.  My best bud Fran who is due to have number two any week now.  Number one Otis is almost two.  It is amazing how he has become a little person with a lot of personality since I last saw him.  Fran also commented on the changes, even though she only saw me in January - apparently my face had changed.

What I love about my close friends is their honesty.  Fran and I went to look at clothes one day (Easter sales)  We at a shop and I was trying stuff on, when Fran goes "Cass, you need a new bra.  That one isn't supporting you.  You don't want your boobs to be hanging by your elbows!"  I guess with losing weight, the bra I had on was too big and no longer supportive at all.  So for the first time since I was 12/13 - I went and got fitted for a bra.  When bigger, I would have never done this.  However, since all the procedures I have over the past year or so - I just don't care anymore.  And the lady in the lingerie shop was just lovely and found bras that were just lovely.  Not the small selection I had to chose from previously.  So I got two for now (she said with losing weight - don't buy too many in one size) - one sport, one normal.  I may buy another.  But it was a fun experience!  And I do recommend.  Having the right bra - my clothes look so much better!

I also caught up with my friend Julie and her two girls.  Julie was the person who encouraged me to go into this journey, stating at the time, I had to look after myself and be selfish for once.  Also stating that money should not be a barrier.  I have so much to be grateful for.  Julie had also struggled with weight during her life, but one day decided it was going and did what she needed to to do it.  She looks terrific and has stayed that way.  She is a very positive person and highly motivational. It was cool, she could not get over the changes - the body, face, and even my gums were looking healthier.  I had never noticed to be honest.  Also my nose was thinner.  Her girls kept saying you are so much smaller and didnt recognise me at first.  He he - found that funny. 
 

Me, Fran and Julie's girls Charlotte and Madeline



Julie, Fran and Me


Saw other friends.  All were very positive about how I had changed.

While down in Dunedin, I was pretty good with the diet, desperately wanting to get rid of the kilo that I had gained in my week of indulgence.  Did a bit of exercise.  Did a lot on my return to Wellington. Also slept a lot.  I realised during this time just how much easier it is to concentrate on good eating and exercise when the stress of work is not there!  As said in a previous post I was rewarded with a 3.2 kilos loss. I also got a small fill (.2mL).  I'm thinking I may just need a .1mL this week to put me fully in the green zone.  See what the nurse says.

The holidays were over too quickly, but I did get to see a couple of movies (Fast 5 and Thor plus DVDs), read books, and caught up with many friends.

On the day I returned to Wellington, I dropped my Dad off at the hospital for some tests.  On picking him up at the ward, the doctor informed my Dad (plus me and my bro) that they had found a growth in his colon.  They had to a biopsy and have since confirmed it is cancer.  I am devastated.  My Dad is the strong one.  He simply said it is all part of life's rich tapestry (about as much emotion as Dad will show - he is British).  It is hoped that it has been caught early and has not spread.  He will have surgery in about 6 weeks or so (tbc) and all going well they can remove the tumour and part of the bowel and it will be all good.  I am really really really hoping for the best case scenario.  So I will be going back to Dunedin to help out where I can.  I feel useless as although I do know there is nothing I can do - the distance and being so far away is hard as I can't just pop over and help where needed.  The phone has been used a lot more in the last week.  In stressful situations like this it is hard not to pick up that chocolate etc, but I made the decision that I need to be at my fittest/healthiest for my Dad so I can help him when he needs it.  I have not touched the chocolate, and found that exercise has helped the stress.  I am in a feeling of disbelief, don't know really what to feel at the moment.  I feel numb.

The rest of the holidays went by quickly.  School work, coffees, lunches and of course the Royal Wedding Party - that was lots of fun.  Pimms cups, tiaras, cucumber sandwiches, British flags, royal waves etc were the order of the day.  Shown at night here, the party continued into the wee hours of the morning.

Crazy? Yeah Maybe :)

It's about time in this journey to make some NSV goals (along with the scale goals aswell of course).  There are the clothing sizes, inches lost etc, however I feel the need to go outside my comfort zone.  And this goal/challenge will do it.  I have entered the following:

This will take place Queens Birthday Weekend.  So at the beginning of June!  It is at the gym I now go to, and is aimed to get women into lifting weights.  My friend Kate reminded me, that once in a hypothetical situation that weight lifting would be my sport of choice if I was to enter the olympics :)  Who knows where this could lead! 

There are 3 lifts to do. 

Squat

The starting position must be completely upright, with the knees and the hips fully extended and with the chest up. The hips are lowered until the top surfaces of both of the legs at the hip joint are lower than the knees, and then the bar is lifted back up. The bottom position is identified by A) the apex of the crease in the shorts formed as the hips are lowered, B) the surface of the top of the patella, C) the plane formed by a straight line between the two, and D) the dipping of the hip end of that plane below horizontal. The finish position is the same as the starting position, and the athlete must return to it before the bar is racked. When the finish position is secure, the bar must be walked back into the rack and successfully replaced.
Any halt in the upward motion of the whole bar, identified at its position on the back rather than at its ends, constitutes a missed attempt, as does any change in position of the feet against the floor during the squat. Any deliberate attempt to lower the bar counts as an attempt.  The squat will be done in the cage and no spotters will be necessary.

I found this pic - good motivation :)

Bench Press

Spotter will assist lifter in getting the bar out of the rack. The spotter will guide the bar over mid chest. There may be communication with your spotter to signal you are ready. The lifter must touch the bar to the chest, then move the bar back up to full lock out position (elbows in full extension). The spotter will then assist to get the bar back in rack position. If the bar touches the rack before the spotter grabs it, there is no lift.
The butt must be in contact with the bench and the feet must be on the ground at all times.

Ground to Overhead (aka Clean and Jerk)

Two hand overhead, anyhow. The most efficient way to accomplish this will be with a clean and jerk. You must lift the barbell from the ground to overhead and finish in a stable, unmoving, locked out position. The athlete’s elbows, shoulders, hips and knees must be locked out and unmoving, and the athlete must wait until the judge gives the audible and visual cue to lower the weight. The bar must be dropped in a controlled manner, with the athlete’s hands on the bar past the hips, for the lift to count.

As can be seen from the above pic, technique is all important.  I am just learning the clean and jerk movements - it's hard!!!  But I will be in that competition - just watch me!!!!

I am loving exercise in general at the moment, the motivation is definitely there too, not in previous years when quite often the pic below described how I felt a lot of the time about working out. I love when it is just easy to want to work out.  I want to stay on this train!!!  Crossfit training rules :)

Under 300 pounds....Yeah Baby!!!

For the first time in well I don't remember, I stood on the scales last week at the clinic, and I had lost 34.9 kilos (76.8lbs).  Working and focusing on being successful with the lap band during the school holidays really paid off, with losing 3.2 kilos in 2 weeks :)  I was stoked!!!  Amazing how easy it was to focus on eating and exercising when there was no stress or work in the way.  YAY!  I haven't actually posted my weight before, but this is a milestone in the journey for me and that is what my blog is about.  So now I weigh 135 kilos (297lbs).  Onwards and downwards I say!!!

So what weighs in at or around 34.9 kilos?  Well there are some interesting things:

This boy

Drinks Dispenser

Baby Camel (awwww cute!)

This sculpture of Keith Richards (made entirely of chocolate!!!)

6 month old polar bear

Fish

Rice dispenser

And I know it's gross, but this tumor!

The Royal Wedding is Nigh

How can someone like myself who really is a keen royalist let another day go by and not put up a post about the wedding.  I am so truly exciting, and now it is just little more than 24 hours away!  It is so nice to have a world event to look forward to, not some of the not so happy news that has covered our screens in recent months.

Young Prince William will marry Katherine Middleton in what could be the Wedding of the Century.  It is the first of its kind this century thats for sure.  I cannot wait to see the dress, a very close secret held.  I'm enjoying much of the lead up to the event, including yesterday when they were placing trees in the Abbey at Kate's request.  These were big trees as well not just your pot plant kind.  There are the rehersals, the schedule of who does what and when, and of course our Prime Minister being the only person to meet with the Queen this week and then they had some champagne afterwards - it is a celebration week after all!

So for the dress, many designers have sketched what they would put her in. 

I myself envisage her in something classic, maybe off the shoulder or strapless, fitting around the bodice, and then flows beautifully to the ground.  The train will be long and embroided.  I do wonder if she will wear a tiara, and if so which one?  Diana wore the Spencer tiara.  Will Kate wear one that Diana did or one loaned to her by Elizabeth?  Wait and see!

Below are some videos I found courtesy of You Tube from previous weddings.  I do remember although young watching Diana and Charles, and Sarah and Andrew, and a little of Edward and Sophie  (What was shown in NZ).

Below is a spoof video of the wedding - very funny!

The Week of Indulgence - Last Week of School

A post a little out of order, but am trying to finally catch up on drafts, half done posts and expanding on what I think to be important headings at the time (A couple of weeks later - some of my wee notes baffle me, so I'll skip those!)

Anyway, along with the great stuff, the gains (NSV's), the weight losses, and all those clothes I seem to keep buying, there also comes weeks that you would rather forget!

This happened a couple of weeks ago, which considered with the last week of the school term.  Now, for non-teachers, I find the third and second to last weeks worse in terms of behaviour and workload, and then the last week, a few more smiles appear around the staffroom and the classroom as everyone can see the light at the end of the tunnel which is the long awaited school holidays.  This term, a long one.  The Government thought it would be a 'smart' move to adjust the term dates, so that when the Rugby World Cup is on, schools will be on holiday and not congesting the motorways, therefore easing traffic woes.  To be honest this may only work in Auckland, and to a lesser extent Wellington (where I live).  However, in return, the school terms are screwed up with 3 long ones and one short one.  It means more work, pressure, and trying to get the kiddies all taught by the end of term 3 as we only have them for a couple of weeks in Term 4 before going off to NCEA exams (National Exams).  Anyway - this last week ended up being just as painful as the previous two, with deadlines and no end in sight for the workload.

I might add, the weekend before - got sick, still sick on the Monday so day in bed.  I have found since I now admit going back to work too early, I have suffered since with little immunity and catching every bug that seems to come around.  I'm hoping with the two week holiday - the rest will give me a boost!
So, being under the weather, my patience was not the best, and the kids seem to be filled with an element of CRAZY!  (later interpreted as I'm basically on holiday mode) I lost my temper at one stage, luckily a co-worker saw I was losing it and took over the class for a while so I could calm down.  I don't normally get like this, but at times the students certainly know the right buttons to push.  After class - I found chocolate - and I ate it, and ate a substantial amount of it.  I had bought this a prizes for quizzes, but after I lost my na na at them decided they weren't getting any!  So I ate it.  Thankfully - after the 4th or 5th easter egg, I realised what I was doing and threw them away!

That event was the last in a line of what I called the "Week of Indulgence"!. I also did some baking.  Firstly for a friends farewell morning tea.  What did I make?  Chocolate Rumballs....mmmmm mmmm.  The temptation was too much and I taste tested some (2-3), to confirm their delicious factor.  In that event, I also made chocolate brownies and banana cake, and 'taste tested' those.  At the time I didn't feel guilty.  I was sick and stressed.  There was also sweet sweet indulgence over the weekend before and a boozy evening with girl friends (but that was so totally worth it - such a fun night!) I have learnt from this that it is actually stress which ignites my sweetness cravings!  Lesson - manage stress in a non food way.

I'm trying the exercise thing.  I am totally loving the new gym, the coaches Donna and Matt and crossfit system they use.  I always come out pumped and excited.  They measure everything from the time you take to do the prescribed workout of the day, to how much you can bench press and what is you maximum weight you can do.  It totally gives you goals to work towards.  Highlight so far - well there are two:  The first being able to sumo deadlift 70kgs - yeah!!!, and the other was completing my first crossfit class (with some exercises moderated to suit my level - but that is the point of crossfit).  I am also looking more into the Paleo diet - a lifestyle that consists of eating the way Paleolithic people did.  No processed foods, lots of meat and animal protein plus good non starchy vegetables.  I will cover this more in a later entry.

Sumo deadlifts - except I had 70kilos to lift :)

I'm also walking, and aim to do more of this.  I need to remember how good I feel after exercise.  The hardest part is often just getting out and doing it in the first place!

Anyway - I did not escape a weight gain after all my indulgences.  I managed to put on 1.2 kilos.  However, unlike last time I did not get depressed about it.  Not all of that was due to the food though.  Still the hormones play a part in this one, and also the fact my hunger had not been tamed.  So, I got a fill.  The fill seems to be working a lot better than previously.  The pangs of constant hunger are all but gone.  As with my last post, not sure if in the green zone yet, or if I still need just a little bit more.  I will see when I go back home from holidays if the fill has worked out   for me in the weight loss department.

With being tighter, the ol' lessons get re- learnt.  Chew at least 20 times.  Small pieces into the mouth, and no skins if possible (for me anyway).  No dry meat.  The last two have caused horrible blockages and a lot of sliming (finally understand what this term means!).  Thinking I was good not having some sauce on the kebab meat - it ended up being too dry and not going down.  Also learnt always have some low calorie soft drink in the house, as it helps move the blockage.  And beer does not work.  Funny thing was I don't even like beer that much, and it was the only fizzy thing in the house - only made it worse!

Finally, I have read a couple of blogs recently about hair loss occurring approx 3-4 months after surgery. As I am approaching the 3rd month -

I'm wondering what causes this?

Does everyone suffer from this?

and is there anything I can do to prevent it from happening?

My hair was not in the greatest condition for the first six weeks after surgery due to the anaesthetic, but it has started to come right and resemble some form of normality.  So I am keen to keep my hair if I can!


Hope everyone has had a good Easter where ever in the world you are  :)

NSV time and How do you know when you are in the green zone?

Well holidays have finally arrived, and I decided to go down home to Dunedin for a bit of R and R, along with catching with friends and family.  So far, the weather has been above expectations, which has been just lovely!

Again, not much of a post, a bit time restrained.  But a couple of NSV's I thought I would share!

First off on the plane - NO extension belt needed!  I just clipped in nicely (not even straining to clip in) to the regular seat belt!   Totally stoked - I was by myself on the plane, but really just wanted to jump up and tell everyone!  YES!!!  I did however refrain from making a tool out of myself :)

Secondly - Since it is coming into Winter here in NZ and going to Dunedin prompted me to pull out the ol' PJ's - I need new PJ's - the bottoms no longer stay up!  Oh dear, more shopping...such is life ;)

The last one I noticed today - I was brushing my hair in the mirror, and saw what I thought were shadow outlines at the bottom of my neck - Ummm when I touched them - they were my collar bones!  Ha ha ha.  I could actually see some of them...Woo hoo!

Next thing I was wondering - for all you experienced bandits out there, how do you know when you are in the green zone.  I have had a few fills now, and feel I might have made it, but just not quite sure if I don't just need a little extra.  I know everyone is different but are there some other guidelines that the clinic doesn't tell you?

Saying that, I'm also still learning eating patterns - I have learnt pumpkin skin is a definite no no for me and causes the most uncomfortable blockage.  Watch how much I put into my mouth and how often, and also making sure meat is not too dry!

Did my mother make me fat?

Finally on holidays! Will update very soon, just enjoying doing anything but work at the moment.  Loving socialising and catching up on things I always mean to do during the school term.  However, will leave this article from todays paper (Stuff.co.nz - 19th April 2011)

NZ research links child obesity to mother's diet

Kiwi scientists have helped prove a link between a mother's diet during pregnancy and the risk of childhood obesity.

The study, led by Southampton University and including New Zealand researchers, shows for the first time that a mother's diet during pregnancy can alter the function of her child's DNA and can lead to children having a tendency to "lay down" more fat.

The study shows this has nothing to do with the mother's weight or the child's weight at birth. Auckland University professor Sir Peter Gluckman, who led the New Zealand arm of the study, said there had been a long-suspected link between a poor start to life and the later development of heart disease, diabetes and obesity, but until now there had not been human data to back up the idea. He said the study confirmed the importance of maternal nutrition to children's development.

"It confirms our suspicions that maternal nutrition does indeed influence the offspring's risk of later obesity and disease ... there is the potential to halt progression towards disease through nutritional and or pharmacological interventions during early life."

The study measured the epigenetic state – the degree of chemical modification – of DNA in umbilical cord tissue of nearly 300 children and showed that this strongly predicted the degree of obesity at six or nine years of age. The amount of change in DNA tissue at birth was associated with features of the mother's diet in the first third of a pregnancy. Predictions based on these results were much stronger than explanations of obesity based on hereditary factors and lifestyle. Sir Peter said the study proved the importance of preventive infant health and could help fight the problem of obesity and diabetes in new ways and earlier in life.

"This study provides the most compelling argument yet for giving greater weight to improving maternal and infant health as a means of reducing the burden of chronic disease. It is manifestly insufficient to focus on interventions in the adult alone."


Interesting article, makes you think!

Another from the same newspaper link (31st March 2010), I came across - although it is really talking about Gastric Bypass Surgery, just reaffirmed how people who haven't had weight loss surgery don't always understand why those who do have often have done it as a last resort, not as a quick fix.  I'm lucky so far, not one person has said to me, Im doing it for a quick fix (and I am quite open about having the surgery).

Is obesity surgery cheating?

Oh yes, I'm all accepting of people and their struggles with weight. Until they mention plans to have surgery to fix it. Then the judgements start inside me.
I'm not particularly proud of that. I try to be pretty open to understanding that we all have our own paths and we all need to find the best way. But if I'm honest, a huge part of me says exactly what I cannot bear people to say to all overweight people: "oh for goodness' sake, get over it, stop eating crap and start moving."
Which really isn't particularly caring, is it? And I know full well it isn't that simple. Not with everyone. As I said, I'm not proud of it.
Personally I believe there is often a huge emotional tie to the excess weight we carry. If we don't process it, then we can't get rid of it for good. If we try to get rid of it, and haven't sorted through some of the emotional stress that put us there, the weight is just going to go back on. So to me, using surgery just makes me think that any chance to sort through that and deal with why you are fat is cut off. Quite literally.
But then a friend of mine announced on twitter the other day that she was finally on the list for the op through the public health system. All those nasty little comments inside me came rising up. Except this time it was about a friend, who I knew was moving and wasn't eating a lot of rubbish. She walks every day, does yoga to a pretty hard-core level, and recently competed in a duathlon. She isn't a lazy slug of a person. And it just isn't working.
Angelique kept a food diary and went to the gym every day for a year and lost one kilogram. ONE. Personally I'd have given up after three months if weight loss had been my goal. She's only decided to have the surgery as her mother had it in February and since then has lost 26kg. She also tried Xenical and a pile of diets and eating plans. Nothing has worked.
Her mother was unable to work due to severe psoriatic arthritis that led to her being housebound. Her medication for her condition is now a third of what it was at the beginning of the year, and she's gone from not being able to move to walking three kilometres a day. While the operation cost around $20,000, this cost is the same as two years of medication and care for her condition. With her life expectancy to be 20 years-plus, this is a large long-term savings for the health system.
I can see the sense of this, and I'm thrilled that it's working, but still a part of me (the illogical part, plainly!) thinks it's cheating. Is it because I'm choosing to do it in a way that has no shortcuts and I'm frustrated at how fast her weight's dropped off? Maybe. I'm not sure. (Man, who knew I was so mean? I'm disappointing myself!)
Psoriatic arthritis is something Angelique suffers from as well, to a lesser degree. She objected to putting her name on the waiting list for a long time, because she didn't think she could cope with the flak she would get from people for taking the easy way out. Only since seeing her mum's results has she changed her mind. Talking to her, I can see she's thought about it a lot. And she's already got a healthy lifestyle. She's not someone I can see will have the op, lose the weight, and then eat her way back up to big again (I do know people who have done this.).
What do you think? We've got people saying surgery is the best way to beat the obesity epidemic, others saying it's about willpower, and then me and others saying it's all about sorting out the baggage before you let it go, and making sure you are eating the foods that make your body work best.
Is only one of these right? Is there a case by case basis that makes it different for each person? Do you think surgery's a good idea? Do you think the health system should fund more of them? Or less? What is the solution?



The comments to this article were mixed.  Some agreed with the writer, but many who actually knew people that had the surgery, knew they had done so many other things beforehand to lose weight but always gained it back.  The surgery was a useful tool is helping with weightloss, but also helped the patient gain back their life as they wanted it to be.  Is that so wrong?