The Royal Wedding is Nigh

How can someone like myself who really is a keen royalist let another day go by and not put up a post about the wedding.  I am so truly exciting, and now it is just little more than 24 hours away!  It is so nice to have a world event to look forward to, not some of the not so happy news that has covered our screens in recent months.

Young Prince William will marry Katherine Middleton in what could be the Wedding of the Century.  It is the first of its kind this century thats for sure.  I cannot wait to see the dress, a very close secret held.  I'm enjoying much of the lead up to the event, including yesterday when they were placing trees in the Abbey at Kate's request.  These were big trees as well not just your pot plant kind.  There are the rehersals, the schedule of who does what and when, and of course our Prime Minister being the only person to meet with the Queen this week and then they had some champagne afterwards - it is a celebration week after all!

So for the dress, many designers have sketched what they would put her in. 

I myself envisage her in something classic, maybe off the shoulder or strapless, fitting around the bodice, and then flows beautifully to the ground.  The train will be long and embroided.  I do wonder if she will wear a tiara, and if so which one?  Diana wore the Spencer tiara.  Will Kate wear one that Diana did or one loaned to her by Elizabeth?  Wait and see!

Below are some videos I found courtesy of You Tube from previous weddings.  I do remember although young watching Diana and Charles, and Sarah and Andrew, and a little of Edward and Sophie  (What was shown in NZ).

Below is a spoof video of the wedding - very funny!

The Week of Indulgence - Last Week of School

A post a little out of order, but am trying to finally catch up on drafts, half done posts and expanding on what I think to be important headings at the time (A couple of weeks later - some of my wee notes baffle me, so I'll skip those!)

Anyway, along with the great stuff, the gains (NSV's), the weight losses, and all those clothes I seem to keep buying, there also comes weeks that you would rather forget!

This happened a couple of weeks ago, which considered with the last week of the school term.  Now, for non-teachers, I find the third and second to last weeks worse in terms of behaviour and workload, and then the last week, a few more smiles appear around the staffroom and the classroom as everyone can see the light at the end of the tunnel which is the long awaited school holidays.  This term, a long one.  The Government thought it would be a 'smart' move to adjust the term dates, so that when the Rugby World Cup is on, schools will be on holiday and not congesting the motorways, therefore easing traffic woes.  To be honest this may only work in Auckland, and to a lesser extent Wellington (where I live).  However, in return, the school terms are screwed up with 3 long ones and one short one.  It means more work, pressure, and trying to get the kiddies all taught by the end of term 3 as we only have them for a couple of weeks in Term 4 before going off to NCEA exams (National Exams).  Anyway - this last week ended up being just as painful as the previous two, with deadlines and no end in sight for the workload.

I might add, the weekend before - got sick, still sick on the Monday so day in bed.  I have found since I now admit going back to work too early, I have suffered since with little immunity and catching every bug that seems to come around.  I'm hoping with the two week holiday - the rest will give me a boost!
So, being under the weather, my patience was not the best, and the kids seem to be filled with an element of CRAZY!  (later interpreted as I'm basically on holiday mode) I lost my temper at one stage, luckily a co-worker saw I was losing it and took over the class for a while so I could calm down.  I don't normally get like this, but at times the students certainly know the right buttons to push.  After class - I found chocolate - and I ate it, and ate a substantial amount of it.  I had bought this a prizes for quizzes, but after I lost my na na at them decided they weren't getting any!  So I ate it.  Thankfully - after the 4th or 5th easter egg, I realised what I was doing and threw them away!

That event was the last in a line of what I called the "Week of Indulgence"!. I also did some baking.  Firstly for a friends farewell morning tea.  What did I make?  Chocolate Rumballs....mmmmm mmmm.  The temptation was too much and I taste tested some (2-3), to confirm their delicious factor.  In that event, I also made chocolate brownies and banana cake, and 'taste tested' those.  At the time I didn't feel guilty.  I was sick and stressed.  There was also sweet sweet indulgence over the weekend before and a boozy evening with girl friends (but that was so totally worth it - such a fun night!) I have learnt from this that it is actually stress which ignites my sweetness cravings!  Lesson - manage stress in a non food way.

I'm trying the exercise thing.  I am totally loving the new gym, the coaches Donna and Matt and crossfit system they use.  I always come out pumped and excited.  They measure everything from the time you take to do the prescribed workout of the day, to how much you can bench press and what is you maximum weight you can do.  It totally gives you goals to work towards.  Highlight so far - well there are two:  The first being able to sumo deadlift 70kgs - yeah!!!, and the other was completing my first crossfit class (with some exercises moderated to suit my level - but that is the point of crossfit).  I am also looking more into the Paleo diet - a lifestyle that consists of eating the way Paleolithic people did.  No processed foods, lots of meat and animal protein plus good non starchy vegetables.  I will cover this more in a later entry.

Sumo deadlifts - except I had 70kilos to lift :)

I'm also walking, and aim to do more of this.  I need to remember how good I feel after exercise.  The hardest part is often just getting out and doing it in the first place!

Anyway - I did not escape a weight gain after all my indulgences.  I managed to put on 1.2 kilos.  However, unlike last time I did not get depressed about it.  Not all of that was due to the food though.  Still the hormones play a part in this one, and also the fact my hunger had not been tamed.  So, I got a fill.  The fill seems to be working a lot better than previously.  The pangs of constant hunger are all but gone.  As with my last post, not sure if in the green zone yet, or if I still need just a little bit more.  I will see when I go back home from holidays if the fill has worked out   for me in the weight loss department.

With being tighter, the ol' lessons get re- learnt.  Chew at least 20 times.  Small pieces into the mouth, and no skins if possible (for me anyway).  No dry meat.  The last two have caused horrible blockages and a lot of sliming (finally understand what this term means!).  Thinking I was good not having some sauce on the kebab meat - it ended up being too dry and not going down.  Also learnt always have some low calorie soft drink in the house, as it helps move the blockage.  And beer does not work.  Funny thing was I don't even like beer that much, and it was the only fizzy thing in the house - only made it worse!

Finally, I have read a couple of blogs recently about hair loss occurring approx 3-4 months after surgery. As I am approaching the 3rd month -

I'm wondering what causes this?

Does everyone suffer from this?

and is there anything I can do to prevent it from happening?

My hair was not in the greatest condition for the first six weeks after surgery due to the anaesthetic, but it has started to come right and resemble some form of normality.  So I am keen to keep my hair if I can!


Hope everyone has had a good Easter where ever in the world you are  :)

NSV time and How do you know when you are in the green zone?

Well holidays have finally arrived, and I decided to go down home to Dunedin for a bit of R and R, along with catching with friends and family.  So far, the weather has been above expectations, which has been just lovely!

Again, not much of a post, a bit time restrained.  But a couple of NSV's I thought I would share!

First off on the plane - NO extension belt needed!  I just clipped in nicely (not even straining to clip in) to the regular seat belt!   Totally stoked - I was by myself on the plane, but really just wanted to jump up and tell everyone!  YES!!!  I did however refrain from making a tool out of myself :)

Secondly - Since it is coming into Winter here in NZ and going to Dunedin prompted me to pull out the ol' PJ's - I need new PJ's - the bottoms no longer stay up!  Oh dear, more shopping...such is life ;)

The last one I noticed today - I was brushing my hair in the mirror, and saw what I thought were shadow outlines at the bottom of my neck - Ummm when I touched them - they were my collar bones!  Ha ha ha.  I could actually see some of them...Woo hoo!

Next thing I was wondering - for all you experienced bandits out there, how do you know when you are in the green zone.  I have had a few fills now, and feel I might have made it, but just not quite sure if I don't just need a little extra.  I know everyone is different but are there some other guidelines that the clinic doesn't tell you?

Saying that, I'm also still learning eating patterns - I have learnt pumpkin skin is a definite no no for me and causes the most uncomfortable blockage.  Watch how much I put into my mouth and how often, and also making sure meat is not too dry!

Did my mother make me fat?

Finally on holidays! Will update very soon, just enjoying doing anything but work at the moment.  Loving socialising and catching up on things I always mean to do during the school term.  However, will leave this article from todays paper (Stuff.co.nz - 19th April 2011)

NZ research links child obesity to mother's diet

Kiwi scientists have helped prove a link between a mother's diet during pregnancy and the risk of childhood obesity.

The study, led by Southampton University and including New Zealand researchers, shows for the first time that a mother's diet during pregnancy can alter the function of her child's DNA and can lead to children having a tendency to "lay down" more fat.

The study shows this has nothing to do with the mother's weight or the child's weight at birth. Auckland University professor Sir Peter Gluckman, who led the New Zealand arm of the study, said there had been a long-suspected link between a poor start to life and the later development of heart disease, diabetes and obesity, but until now there had not been human data to back up the idea. He said the study confirmed the importance of maternal nutrition to children's development.

"It confirms our suspicions that maternal nutrition does indeed influence the offspring's risk of later obesity and disease ... there is the potential to halt progression towards disease through nutritional and or pharmacological interventions during early life."

The study measured the epigenetic state – the degree of chemical modification – of DNA in umbilical cord tissue of nearly 300 children and showed that this strongly predicted the degree of obesity at six or nine years of age. The amount of change in DNA tissue at birth was associated with features of the mother's diet in the first third of a pregnancy. Predictions based on these results were much stronger than explanations of obesity based on hereditary factors and lifestyle. Sir Peter said the study proved the importance of preventive infant health and could help fight the problem of obesity and diabetes in new ways and earlier in life.

"This study provides the most compelling argument yet for giving greater weight to improving maternal and infant health as a means of reducing the burden of chronic disease. It is manifestly insufficient to focus on interventions in the adult alone."


Interesting article, makes you think!

Another from the same newspaper link (31st March 2010), I came across - although it is really talking about Gastric Bypass Surgery, just reaffirmed how people who haven't had weight loss surgery don't always understand why those who do have often have done it as a last resort, not as a quick fix.  I'm lucky so far, not one person has said to me, Im doing it for a quick fix (and I am quite open about having the surgery).

Is obesity surgery cheating?

Oh yes, I'm all accepting of people and their struggles with weight. Until they mention plans to have surgery to fix it. Then the judgements start inside me.
I'm not particularly proud of that. I try to be pretty open to understanding that we all have our own paths and we all need to find the best way. But if I'm honest, a huge part of me says exactly what I cannot bear people to say to all overweight people: "oh for goodness' sake, get over it, stop eating crap and start moving."
Which really isn't particularly caring, is it? And I know full well it isn't that simple. Not with everyone. As I said, I'm not proud of it.
Personally I believe there is often a huge emotional tie to the excess weight we carry. If we don't process it, then we can't get rid of it for good. If we try to get rid of it, and haven't sorted through some of the emotional stress that put us there, the weight is just going to go back on. So to me, using surgery just makes me think that any chance to sort through that and deal with why you are fat is cut off. Quite literally.
But then a friend of mine announced on twitter the other day that she was finally on the list for the op through the public health system. All those nasty little comments inside me came rising up. Except this time it was about a friend, who I knew was moving and wasn't eating a lot of rubbish. She walks every day, does yoga to a pretty hard-core level, and recently competed in a duathlon. She isn't a lazy slug of a person. And it just isn't working.
Angelique kept a food diary and went to the gym every day for a year and lost one kilogram. ONE. Personally I'd have given up after three months if weight loss had been my goal. She's only decided to have the surgery as her mother had it in February and since then has lost 26kg. She also tried Xenical and a pile of diets and eating plans. Nothing has worked.
Her mother was unable to work due to severe psoriatic arthritis that led to her being housebound. Her medication for her condition is now a third of what it was at the beginning of the year, and she's gone from not being able to move to walking three kilometres a day. While the operation cost around $20,000, this cost is the same as two years of medication and care for her condition. With her life expectancy to be 20 years-plus, this is a large long-term savings for the health system.
I can see the sense of this, and I'm thrilled that it's working, but still a part of me (the illogical part, plainly!) thinks it's cheating. Is it because I'm choosing to do it in a way that has no shortcuts and I'm frustrated at how fast her weight's dropped off? Maybe. I'm not sure. (Man, who knew I was so mean? I'm disappointing myself!)
Psoriatic arthritis is something Angelique suffers from as well, to a lesser degree. She objected to putting her name on the waiting list for a long time, because she didn't think she could cope with the flak she would get from people for taking the easy way out. Only since seeing her mum's results has she changed her mind. Talking to her, I can see she's thought about it a lot. And she's already got a healthy lifestyle. She's not someone I can see will have the op, lose the weight, and then eat her way back up to big again (I do know people who have done this.).
What do you think? We've got people saying surgery is the best way to beat the obesity epidemic, others saying it's about willpower, and then me and others saying it's all about sorting out the baggage before you let it go, and making sure you are eating the foods that make your body work best.
Is only one of these right? Is there a case by case basis that makes it different for each person? Do you think surgery's a good idea? Do you think the health system should fund more of them? Or less? What is the solution?



The comments to this article were mixed.  Some agreed with the writer, but many who actually knew people that had the surgery, knew they had done so many other things beforehand to lose weight but always gained it back.  The surgery was a useful tool is helping with weightloss, but also helped the patient gain back their life as they wanted it to be.  Is that so wrong?

Crazy busy! And progress in pictures :)

I can tell the end of the school term is nigh.  Every time the last weeks finally appear, it seems to get just crazy busy!  Parent/teacher interviews, reports, assessments and all that marking that goes with it!  I'm swamped!  However, Im loving the weekends, where Im trying to do as little work as possible (with varying success) but at least having some form of social life.  This past week my little bro was up on a design conference and stayed a little longer to catch up with his big sis.  Good times.  My parents don't visit (My mum only twice, and my dad once in the nine years I've been here - one being my wedding!) So I love it when he comes to visit as he is my only other family member in the country.  Always good is that we manage to squeeze in a trip to the movies usually a horror.  This time was Saw VII 3D - because it is just not sick enough in two dimensions.  Blood splatter and guts everywhere....love it :)

Anyway, back to the weight loss.....

Another fill last week, after still feeling hungry and not getting full much.  The latest fill (a big one) has helped a bit, but feel another may finally put me in the green zone, so have got another next week.  To my surprise, when weighing in - I had lost 2.5 kilos!!!  Woo hoo, just when I didn't expect it.   So now I have lost a total of 32.9kilos (72.4lbs).

So what weighs about 32.9 kilos?

These child robots

This fish

Big dog

The weight of luggage allowed on this airline



And this seizure of cocaine!

I thought I would also put in some progress shots too.



MID - OCTOBER 2010

    

APRIL 1st 2011

The dogs thought since I was near the door, it was walkies time...bless :)

Am still doing the crossfit training, and truly am loving it!!  Short, intense, high weight low reps workouts that have you puffing afterwards.  My times are also not far from the others, so soon I will feel confident enough to do the classes with others.  Exciting!!!!



What I learnt this week!

First of all.....thank you for all the supportive and positive comments, and to my friends I see everyday the hugs and reassurance.

I'm feeling 100% better than I did this time last week.  I have learnt that my biggest enemy is MYSELF!  Nobody else.  It is something I have to work through, and with time my head space will catch up to all the changes going on in my life. 

My personal trainer in one of my last sessions with him (he is off to become a policeman), who knows me very well summed it up.  "Oh no, Cassie did not achieve excellence in her weight loss this week.  She focuses on the 900g she put on, doesn't matter about the 30 kilos she has lost.  She didn't get the perfect result this week."  (This all said with dripping sarcasm) It helped, and helped to reset my thinking.  Thanks Clayton :)  After 5 years with him - we have parted ways.  He has seen me through many weight loss ventures, and the gains from them.  However, at our last workout session, he left me at my best weight loss and on my way to me being the healthiest I can be.  He can be proud of his efforts, and tolerance with me over the years, and from that I am proud of myself as well....there I said it.  Yay!

This week I have started with a new trainer at a place called Mad Crossfit - a new system, and a new approach to achieving my goals.  Put to me by Clayton, it is a new exciting challenge.  Have had two sessions so far, and today I was doing shuttle runs...who would have thought???  Am starting with PT sessions and will build up to joining the hour long classes (small 6-8 people) once I more confident and familiar with the moves and techniques.  I'm loving it.  My new trainer, Donna is great - not too girly either - can't cope with those type of trainers!  The whole Mad Crossfit idea comes from the States, and they brought it here.  The focus is on  building strength and getting fit.  They can help with eating etc. but when it comes to the number on the scales, they aren't focussed on that.  I will leave the numbers to the clinic.  Fun times ahead :)

More positive things - after having an incident with a student's behaviour at school (work), I was pretty down on myself (again) - I posted a comment on Facebook about it not being my best teaching day, and outlined the basics of what happened which lead me to walking out on the class (putting myself in timeout) as it got to a point where I was either going to cry or completely nut off at the student.  Didn't expect much from the comment to be honest, but had some amazing supportive and positive comments from friends and ex students which again, put things in a better light for me.   Here were some of them:

I think you did the right thing by removing yourself from the situation Cass. And don't beat yourself up about it, you're only human, this k...ind of thing happens to everyone. I'd bet 100 bucks that it's happened to every other teacher you know at some point.  Yup, tomorrow will be better :-)

That is why I'm not a teacher..... I would need timeout everyday :D Tomorrow is going to be a better day!

I sympathise Cass and I hope that you have a much better day tomorrow. It's good you took yourself out of the situation. XO

Teaching is fantastic when it's good but god it sucks when you have a bad day... wine time? much love xx

much understanding from here - I felt that way so much last year! Thank god for an understanding HOD. Take it easy and tomorrow they will be angels for you :) Or else slam them!

It happens to us all, even JV! Tomorrow's another day, teenagers have short memories :)

silly students!! you need us back, we were the best aye hehehe ;) I hope tomorrow will be better for you and that, that class will calm down for you, other wise just bust out some kung fu hahaha x

It's okay, the awsum 7th formers of last year never saw that side of you, we all still think your awsum!

Everyday was your best day as a teacher !

Tomorrow is another day and you did the right thing. We all need space sometimes and with the pressure we are all under its a wonder it doesn't happen more often. Hang in there, I can see the holidays coming in fast:)

Don't beat yourself up about it. You've had a tough week and they must've tried it on when you didn't have much patience left.   Like someone else said, they probably will be angels next lesson.

We had teachers like that everyday, and you were definitly not one of them You are a great teacher

Miss u made me love bio haha now im doing a degree at it!! all thanks to u haha!! ur an awesome teacher i miss ur ways haha !

Kia Kaha Cass. You have to be strong to be a teacher, keep at it!!!!! xoxoxoxox

It was the students comments (in blue)  that actually touched me the most - never realised that saw me like that - quite humbling, but a lot of warm fuzzies.  Must remember to focus on the positive!

On the weight loss, I booked in to see the nurse, and got a fill - 0.6mL up to 3.6 mL now and booked in again in 2 weeks for another fill.  After about a day I felt more restriction.  I told her how although I thought I was chewing food enough, it still got stuck.  Turns out, its now the quality of chewing but the quantity of chewing!  I'm still eating too fast and the food doesnt have enough time to get through the band before the next lot is on its way - so build up occurs causing a blockage.  So focus is on chewing for a long time, putting utensils down and breaking between bites of food.  A learning process, but have not had a blockage since then.  The nurse was also very pleased with my progress and again told me not to worry about a less than a kilo gain.  I lost most of the 900g in the next week.  It does flucuated.   Other big tip I learnt - have water before a meal to lubricate my throat and reduce sticking/blocking.  Makes perfect sense really!!

So my week improved :)  I have more to blog but sleep calls for now.....'till next time.

This is not a cheery post....be warned.

This week - my head space has just gone nuts.  Only way I can explain it.

I have noticed that my perception of myself is still locked up in October 2010 before this journey began.  Although I know I have lost weight (scales don't lie) I cannot see myself as changed in the mirror.  I talked to a lady at the clinic about it and apparently it is very normal to be like this.  I just feel I am not improving.  I do have depression for which I am on medication, however I dont feel in control of my emotions at all.  While the pain from a few weeks back turned out to me starting to ovulate again, I am wondering if this sudden restart of hormones after such a long time without periods is also playing a part.  It came to ahead today when I just broke down crying (my poor husband....a very wet shoulder).  I feel helpless at this point.  Hubby urged me to go and see the clinic counsellor (probably not a bad idea) to talk through things.

I do try and be positive, and am working on accepting compliments (hard!).  Three co-workers commented on my visable loss this week, and being from those people, I know it is genuine.  I just dont see it myself. 

I also put on 900g this week - didn't really help things either.  After discussion, it has been worked out that I do need a fill as I am getting hungry a lot and craving sugar, and things I shouldnt have.  I have been guilty of indulging in some chocolate and chips this week.  Overwhelming guilt afterwards though.  Hope the fill helps this week, as it worked a treat last time.

Work is a bit bleh, half way through the term, a lot of work creeping on, and the weather is definitely turning towards the Winter side.  Kids get a bit crabby at this time of term.  Some more than others - one deciding to light the girls toilets on fire on Monday.  Fire, ambulance and police brought in.  Quite an event!

Exercise has definitely been the highlight of the week.  Manage two excellent workouts with PT using weights (first time since op).  Really felt it the next day, but a good pain.  Walks are still going as well.  Yay!


Finally, thoughts and prayers go out to those affected by the Japan earthquake.  Too soon after the Christchurch one a couple of weeks ago.  My own problems are rather insignificant in comparison.

Hoping for a better week ahead!